007 | Action / Video

[keyandstar]

ooc: Finally coming back from what turned out to be an incredibly long hiatus, sorry about that everyone. After some thinking and discussing I decided that what makes the most sense (I should have thought about this in advance I know) is that Lirael here has been mallynapped. This is her return home after that experience. She's fine, just a little confused since it's been weeks.

Action:

[ If anyone wants to wander into a slightly confused and disoriented Lirael, this is your chance. Break time and space and go crazy, she can be just about anywhere but eventually she does make her way back to house 44 and gets inside, at which point she immediately heads for the kitchen and starts rummaging around to find something to eat. She's a little too out of it to actually manage anything constructive though so she might need a hand. ]

Video:

[ Once the dust has cleared and Lirael has been fed and rested and had a bath and all of that good stuff, she makes one of her rare and usually brief video appearances because ugh showing her face to everyone is just so very awkward. Still, it felt like it might be a good idea since she's been gone for quite a while. ]

Uh, hello. I don't know if... [ If anyone noticed? That sounds a little rude, doesn't it? ] I mean... um... I've been gone for a while. Apparently.

I just wanted to say that I'm back now, and I'm fine. In case someone was... Just... In case.

[ Yes Luceti, the Queen of Awkward has indeed come back to you. Aren't you all so glad? ]

Comments

[windandrain]

I did. And...that's why it's difficult.

[Flip-sizzle-flip. It's all rote now.]

Lirael. I...just...I don't know. I didn't know. But Clint is a mortal. I am not. And I don't know if I can face his death when it comes. I think it would break me, losing someone that important. [She couldn't admit it to anyone else, but Lirael's safe enough. With a sign she plops out a second pancake and wobbles over to Lirael to offer the plate with unsteady hands.]

I'm a coward. A selfish coward. We were getting serious. And I ran. There were other reasons...like my broken promise...but at the heart of it I'm just a coward. I don't deserve him, and he should have better than me.

[keyandstar]

[ Lirael takes the plate and puts it on the table, then she gets to her feet and pulls Saori into a hug. ]

But you're wonderful.

[windandrain]

[The hug...honestly surprises her. She hesitates, but eventually does return it. She doesn't really know how to respond to that, but the words are a help. She did what she did for herself, and for him, and Yuuna. And...it was just not right. Maybe she had been arrogant, as Adele said, but it wasn't something a mortal could really understand.

For now though, she just wants Lirael to talk and help stem the flow of tears.]

[keyandstar]

I don't know if it helps you any, but I'd probably be terrified too if... if someone were to fall in love with me.

[ She strokes Saori's back soothingly, all the while feeling like she's absolutely terrible at this whole being a comforting and supportive friend thing. ]

[windandrain]

It...Lirael...one day you'll fall in love too. And you won't be scared of it. But it's...it's different for me. To love a mortal, knowing it will only end with pain.

[Worse than this? Probably. She remembers losing some human friends ages ago, and how hard it was on them and her, knowing she'd go on without them.]

At least this way...we'll be friends and he can find someone else to love. Like you will. And this way...without him I won't ever, ever forget my promise.

[keyandstar]

Your promise to Yuuna?

[ She's just guessing here. ]

[windandrain]

My promise to Yuuna. To never forget her, or place another above her.

[You guessed right.]

[keyandstar]

So why did you get involved with him in the first place?

[ Because that's a pretty heavy promise right there. ]

[windandrain]

I...honestly wasn't expecting it to get as serious as it did. I never, ever placed him above her in my heart, but the Malnosso...they made me break my promise. They made me forget her. And after that I started...well, I started thinking.

I...other people...told me there are different kinds of love, and that what happened was okay. But that didn't stop me from thinking, and worrying.

[keyandstar]

You do know that putting one thing next to another isn't the same as placing it above it, right?

[ Not that she feels as if she has any right to really speak here since she's never loved anyone at all like that, but still. ]

[windandrain]

I...I know that. Lirael, it's more than that. But that doesn't mean I didn't forget. And there are other reasons...I just...I'm a coward.

[keyandstar]

But if you run away from Clint... how do you know you won't run away from Yuuna? And you forgot because they took the memories from you. That wasn't your fault.

[windandrain]

With her it's different. I...she's not mortal. She's like me. So we can't be separated by time like that.

And...I know that, logically. But that doesn't make it any less distressing. If my memories aren't my own then what are they?

[keyandstar]

Just because something can be taken away from you it doesn't mean it's not yours. People can take pretty much everything away, when you think about it.

[windandrain]

That...is true. I just...it didn't feel right, staying with Clint. It was greedy, having two loves. And that scared me too. It was all confusing. And maybe it was wrong, but I think it's safer this way. Even if it hurts now.

[keyandstar]

If it didn't feel right then maybe it just wasn't. You shouldn't be with someone if it feels like it's wrong, that probably won't lead to happy things in the end.

[windandrain]

Right. That...well, that was it too. I don't want to accidentally ruin what we have, by keeping things so serious. That's...well, I want him in my life, but in that way it doesn't feel right.

[keyandstar]

How did he take it?

[windandrain]

He was confused. But I...think everything's alright. We talked for a long time, and we had a nice dinner after.

We've both taken a little time to ourselves though, to sort out our heads.